Is this your wife, Sir?

It is the hotel cohabiting statement which will require all tourists to sign a statement when they check in confirming that they live together.

When the news broke I immediately thought of Fawlty Towers. As it stands, there may be 50 flights per week about to take off from Germany bound for the Balearics from next week.

But hotel sources are saying that bookings are very slow, and now that guests will have to officially declare who they are on holiday with will surely make people think twice.

So, you rock up at reception and you have to demonstrate that all of your holiday companions are part of your Covid bubble. Come on, how’s that going to work? Apart from having to travel with negative Covid tests documents, what’s next - a marriage certificate?

What happens if you are not married to your male or female roommate? Mind you, it will guarantee that wives and husbands know exactly where their other halves are and what they are getting up to on a long weekend away!

What is more, does this apply to all hotel guests, even residents here in Mallorca? Should I get quizzed about my personal status by a complete stranger who has no judicial powers next time I go to a hotel, reception will be in for a big surprise ...